Applelites Screaming into the Wind

I didn’t go to work today…DAMN! We had a skiff of snow here in the Puget Sound region and people love to freak around here and blow things totally out of proportion. It has become a cultural phenomenon in this area.
People, especially women, just scream at the sight of snow. Of course much of it is contrived nonsense to avoid work and that is fine with me. These women at work just wind each other into a frenzy about it. Two of them drive Jeep Wagoneers that could ford a river but can they cut through two inches of snow? EEEeeeeekkkkk!!! It is funny to watch the progression. First there is the warning OH JEEZ IT’S STIIIICCKKKING !!! We better leave right NOW!

So I was leaving and got about a block and was dead stopped, I turned around and went back to work and worked on an on-line assignment that is coming due and killed two hours. The ironic thing is if I had left when I did at first I think I would have gotten home the same time. I also heard that the road I was on at first was closed and everyone had to turn around, so I feel like I bingoed that deal.

My operations manager called and was asking me leading questions like “uh…do you think UPS will be driving today…(pregnant pause, me thinking…). I reply “oh HELL NO! those…brown… vans? With no weight in the back? Not a prayer”,and poured another cup of coffee.

Having the day off today e-mailing and relaxing for the most part I have a little apple/monkey carrying on about apple and how it is the single greatest company ever. He is on the apple computer acid trip of course but also the ipod and phone and any other fucking abomination they churn out. He is totally eaten up with the disease. He even said he watched a two hour Steve Jobs conference, most likely squinting at that ¾” ipod screen like a madman.There again, fine!? Who cares? Well he does. Just to own it and use it has never been quite enough for the appleites.

The thing about Apple computers is I have no problem with them, never have, never will. They have not hurt me in any way and they won’t because I won’t let them. HA! They are just another tool to get your hands on. I have fiddled with them a bit and they seem fine as far as they go. The Jehovah’s Witness Church and Vegan’s are fine too, just leave me out of your little personal hell.


Why shouldn’t I try it? Well besides no desire, I am invested in Windows. I don’t have hundreds of dollars in software and add-ons it is thousands. It isn’t all legally upstanding stuff but it is here ready willing and able to amuse me. I also like sticking with things. There is comfort in continuity. My e-mail address hasn’t changed in many years. If someone were to GIVE me a brand new top-of-the-line apple would I play with it? Sure why not. If I had one at work would I use it? Sure that’s the way work, works so to speak.

I was talking to our designer last night watching the snow. He has a brand new top flite apple and was using illustrator. I like watching the guy work because he is very fast and creative as well. I asked him if he stays away from the computer when he goes home at night after using it all day. He said “you can’t escape technology man”. He on lives on Capitol Hill in an apartment and has no, TV, or ipod or any sech accoutrements. He does have a laptop which runs windows and he plays games and occasionally watches a movie on it, he has no home internet connection.

I asked him about the apple deal before and he just said “hey it’s what they bought”. He seemed to think they bought apple just because they already had apple software for it. It is the only apple in the place. While he was using illustrator I said “Christ that looks just like Photoshop”. He said it is basically the same thing they just dumbed it down to run on apple J

Another reason I have never been hot for apple is it is a proprietary thing. Microsoft makes software that runs on a variety of devices, but apple makes the whole shitterey. They remind me of companies like e-machine where if you want to open the box and chisel in a new video card you are screwed you have to use their junk. They have traditionally always wanted the whole pie, the CPU’s and all the hardware. The original Mac’s had the CRT and everything all in one box which makes upgrades and changes pretty tough. Apple used to sue people all the time if they copied their designs.

It reminds a person of Sony Beta-Max or Polaroid. They both really missed the boat by being greedy, stingy fucks and apple almost did too. They almost went under in what, 97? One reason they didn’t is they got some “partnership” money from Microsoft. If you really think about it I bet it is actually in Microsoft’s best interest they stay afloat to avoid more anti-trust heat. Anyway apple has just been a cluster fuck through the years. Now they LOVE Jobs, before they kicked him out of the company.
Can you remember back when he was pushing NEXT? GAWD I guess that software is like Microsoft’s ME, the worst product they ever made.

When these discussions come up people always assume, wrongly, that Windows computers are the first I have owned they would be wrong. The first was a Commodore. I did play around with something they were trying to call a “computer” at Edmonds CC, which used punchcards. After Commodore I bought a Tandy which had its own OS if you want to call it that. I needed a word processor and it did do that and I had a couple games and limped along with it. It was a damn site better than a typewriter.

For a couple years I didn’t have a computer and when I finally re-upped it was Windows 95. All the things they had promised us for years were finally coming true. I use mine now for work, home and school. I shop on it, communicate, and all manner of things like photography. It is damn handy and I use it all the time and never once in my life have I needed or wanted an apple.

I do think PC’s are a little harder to maintain. MACs are more for the type of people that just want to put gas in their car and drive it and never have to know how it actually works. I have heard it said that PC owners are the type that are more likely to rip the side off their machine and tear into it and I agree with that analogy. More women like MACs.

But my little friend didn’t say today that apple is changing its name and taking the “computer” off. He also thought it was good news that they were making it so you could dual boot into OSX or Windows. They are making MAC’s now with INTEL processors and most people who use MAC’s use Microsoft Office for MAC’s . Seems funny to me, damn funny to bitch about Microsoft then use their products.

Face it folks apple has hung its hat on the ipod and iphone and similar products. Face it applelites you lost the computer software war sometime back and no one cares about apple hardware. Go ahead and start screaming into the wind about how the iphone is god’s gift to the technorati. Buy your $599 iphone I will limp along with my free phone that works great and has a better camera, text messaging, internet and more.